SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT!
So, tonight I feel like I’ve been through the emotional wringer. All over people that don’t exist, and events that didn’t happen. I should’ve seen this coming. I had already spoiled myself about poor, adorable, lovesick Will’s demise, and had therefore put off watching last week’s episode of the Good Wife as a result. So, of course, after I am all keyed up over a crackpot internet theory becoming reality at the end of How I Met Your Mother (and me somehow liking it anyway), I somehow thought it would be a good idea to put myself through Will being killed. By fucking Silas. I knew I never liked that boy. So, after feeling oddly warm and happy, Ted holding up a blue horn outside Robin’s dog-filled window after the loss of his adorable wife, worked for me. Even though I always hated the theory, somehow the execution worked for me. It spoke of second chances, or something. And as Robin said in one episode, regarding Barney I think, timing is everything. I got so sick of him pining after her, but I dunno. I guess because season 1 was so great, I’m a sucker for that blue horn. And that does settle the unsettling question of why he spent so much damn time talking about Robin, and about why the whole story started with her. Also- bonus, no one turned up as a lumber jack. So, there’s that.
But, the Good Wife. I know Josh Charles wanted to do other things, and that’s fine and everything, but seriously, you couldn’t just throw him in jail or put him a coma or something? I knew it was coming and I was still devastated. And then previews, the fucking previews. Peter is such an ass, I hope he goes back to jail. Like, I’m sorry, once you lay with whores you should feel grateful that Alicia even looks at your trifling ass. And I thought Mr. Big was kind of an asshole, but at least Carrie totally deserved it, because Carrie sucks as a person. And even Mr Big never called Carrie a selfish bitch, and she actually WAS a selfish bitch.
I watch too much TV. Repeat with me, Will Gardner and Alicia Florrick are not real people. Their happiness doesn’t matter. Deep breaths. No, Not working. And one episode after an episode filled with Will making adorable love eyes at Alicia. Fucking cruel writers. Will was at his most adorable, and now he’s dead.
And it’s late. Sleep, should be a good thing. Sigh. At least I still have Cary right? He’s adorable…that’s something. But Will and Alicia! And Will and Diane! And Will and yoga bitch. Wait, not that last one. Yoga bitch sucks.
You know, this is the writers fault for making characters I care about. Literally the entire cast of Glee could die (not in real life, but on the show) and I would laugh my ass off.
But not Will!!! Oh well, at least I have that blue horn. And angry internet people, so that’s something. And at least I have the Eagles great receiving core…oh wait.
Oh well. Well, farewell to Will Gardner, Alicia should’ve chose you. And farewell to How I Met Your Mother. You went pretty downhill there, but you ended well, and those first few seasons are some of my favorite things. The crazy/hot scale, the blue horn, and nothing good happening after 2am will live on forever, on netflix and on dvd and in syndication. Oh, and fake Moby, that guy is crazy.