Apathy is an underrated human emotion. As much as apathy gets a bum rap, the truth is- most things, and especially most people, are not worth caring about, or knowing about, or getting to know. And occasionally some horrible, or some great, story will stun me into giving a shit. A baby shot in the head, a girl shot in the head (I swear that’s a coincidence) being able to get out of the hospital, go to school, fight another day. Its awesome that people do that, it is. But, most people aren’t awesome fighters, most people…just are. They aren’t even necessary evil, they are just boring. Really boring. Amorphous blobs. And maybe they have thoughts, and dreams, and wishes, but its impossible for me to care. I can’t do the small talk, the inane chit-chat. I don’t feel like keeping up an aol conversation, Unless you’ve made it onto the list of people I give a shit about, and even then- my energy and patience aren’t what they once were. And the world really is an awful, terrible, place. And, I find, there is still stuff I enjoy. Just less of it. I really do like just walking around by myself. I like walking through a park. I like taking pictures. Baby and kitten pictures make me go aww. But, a decent % of that aww is just an understanding that that thing is cute. Like, its cute, I like looking at cute things. But, its hardly deep within my soul. And, I do want Alicia to end up with Will on the Good Wife. I really enjoyed my starbucks double chocolately chip drink. Sometimes its easier to care about fake people then real ones. I like walking around downtown, but the city is still filled with shitty people. Most cities are. Most suburbs are, most rural areas are, most small towns are. And, this probably seems like a return to the angsty blogs of yesteryear. But, this isn’t. For one, it’ll probably be the last I write for awhile again. Not that I don’t do stuff. Watch the news, watch the games. But I don’t have enough thoughts to string together to make a point. Not a point that someone else didn’t already make anyway. There’s very little new in this world. And I do care about what happens- its intellectually interesting. But, things are kinda more interesting than people. And though feelings are a necessary part of the human condition, most people aren’t really worth having them for. So, its apathy for me. I think I made the right call.