My brain refuses to acknowledge that Eli Manning has won two super bowls. I blame Gisele. She cursed that douchebag Tom Brady, and now the stupid Giants reign supreme. Again. Ugh. Must be cosmic punishment for being enough of a twit to tell people to PRAY for her stupid husband. That woman wouldn’t know a football if it hit her in the brain. She’s a freaking twit. Who is WAY less hot than Bridget Moynahan.
Also, and some people may take issue with this one- it is stupid to pray on freaking sports. And I am a HUGE sports fan (I certainly know more about sports than Gisele, because I know if your best football game as a QB is one in which you intentionally ground in the end zone, leading to a safety, you should probably enter into a different profession). Anyway, I watch the news. I see children being chopped with a hatchet by their father, and war and famine, and death. And a murderous dictator kills his people, and the UN can’t even condemn him. And Gisele thinks we should be praying for her stupid husband? Fuck that noise. As much as I HATE Eli Manning, and the Giants, and their goddamn parade down Broadway, there is some satisfaction in him and his stupid twit of a wife losing. Of the idea of there being a “curse of Gisele”.
And, I know, maybe my hatred of her is ever so slightly hypocritical . But, that was in jest. Also, the Yankees are legitimately evil and opposed to God. I haven’t seriously prayed for a team to win since I was thirteen. And..that team lost. Was swept. Stupid choking situation . And you know why they lost? Well, yeah, they switched goalies, and, well, choked..but more importantly- God didn’t listen to my prayer. Do you know why? Because it would have been fucked up if he had.
What type of self-centered view of God do you need to have to believe he’s going to answer your prayers about games, while he quite obviously ignores the prayers of all those who truly suffer? That would be fucked. If God really listened to Gisele…she’s a self-centered twit. Who is less hot than Bridget Moynahan. I used to be on her mental level- when I was thirteen. What on earth is her excuse?
May the curse continue…